earning and regret

"it's the first time i had to earn it this way."

i understand the regret.



                        growing      polarization       in the city



"it's perfectly true."

in the middle of a conversation with a friend...

"Because it's the broken people 
who know what beauty and intellect actually look like, 
and the cost of having such wonderful gifts that are above the average experience."

slow to realizations...easy to pronounce a metaphor

i have noticed how tunnel vision comes out when i'm making lots of blackout poetry.

one external limit is the words given to me, for example, i have lately been going to an old pocket book of art history. hence so many undertones (or overtones) of religion and such.

an internal limitation is simply, myself. while i'm sure there's some study just waiting to be picked up by a overzealous psychologist, i am limited to words that appeal to me. at least in the initial process.
as i work through it, i get rid of particular phrases or words that direct the poetry into the final theme. occasionally i can only "make it work" by getting rid of a word or phrase that i really want to keep. the problem is that it doesn't flow with all the other words.

somehow, i'm sure this can be some sort of metaphoric life application.

in the meantime, it's nice to be back into regularly working on blackouts. expect many more as i go through this old book.

hope for christianity, honesty

original structure can still be unbroken

here one feels the protection of Christ

those remaining
are the only
possible
representations of Christianity

complaint of capitalist church

the end of the recurrent myth
of the "purity" of churches

no reminder should disturb reality
never existed

emphasis on pomp
overshadowed
reason
for the Church to be poor, lowly

everything had to contribute
to church
appearing as a paradise

fundamental legalism

obeys the rules
reached by the faithful
after measured progress...

heaven
represent God's work of salvation progress

to find the right church

the question
encouraged basic differences

share the same overall plan


discussion as to how we find being